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100+ funny dark jokes and puns that will definitely crack you up

When discussing sensitive topics, dark-humor jokes work best. It is frowned upon to openly discuss certain issues in the community, particularly in public places or platforms. However, comedians have discovered a way to convey important messages about taboo subjects by using funny dark jokes and puns.

We live in an angry world, despite the fact that comedy is a surefire way to cheer people up, help them relax, and let go of their worries. While dark humor and jokes may be purposefully offensive, they are an excellent way to debrief. We relieve stress by sitting in an audience and listening to someone recite edgy puns, regardless of how they rub us the wrong way.Information Guide Nigeria


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Best dark humor jokes and puns

Humor is subjective in the sense that what some people find amusing is boring to others. When it comes to laughter, however, one style is looked down on far more than others. Nonetheless, most people wish they were capable of dark humor.

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Offensive jokes

If you consider yourself to have a dark sense of humor but are concerned about how to crack your sensitive jokes without offending anyone, check out the online samples listed below to learn how to use funny dark puns without necessarily offending anyone:100+ funny dark jokes and puns that will definitely crack you up

  • Is there a discount at the crematorium if someone burns to death?
  • After my girlfriend left me, I stole her wheelchair. Guess who returned crawling?
  • My wife wrote “this is not working” on the fridge, but it works perfectly fine.
  • My therapist told me that time heals all wounds. As a result, I stabbed her.
  • Execution is the focus of all ISIS jokes.
  • For my blind sister’s birthday, I bought her a cheese grater. Later, she told me that it was the most violent book she’d ever read.
  • Hello and welcome to plastic surgery. It’s great to see so many new faces.
  • S*ex is like breathing. It only matters if you don’t get any. Stop hunting elephants.
  • Everyone knows that grilling an elephant is the best way to eat it. When a doctor told a man, “you’ll be at peace soon,” he thought he was going to die.
  • The doctor indicated that the man’s wife was dying. When a husband gets home from work, he finds his wife watching Food Network.
  • He inquires, “Why are you watching that? “You still can’t cook,” the wife says, “and why do you watch p*rn?” You’re still unable to f*ck.”
  • What exactly is the distinction between acne and a Catholic priest? Acne usually appears on a boy’s face after the age of 12.
  • What is the distinction between Jesus and a representation of Jesus? You only need one nail to hang the picture.
  • A man comes out of a coma. “I can’t rely on you in anything, can I?” his wife complains as she changes out of her black clothes.
  • My grief counselor passed away. I didn’t care because he was so good.

Dark dad jokes

Dads are nurturing, protective, providers, a shoulder to cry on, and so much more. They also teach you a variety of skills, such as changing car tires and riding bikes. Here are some hilarious dark humor dad jokes to share with your father or family members:50+ Best Ankara designs for gowns to wear in 2023 (pictures)

  • Do you know why I despise the song “I Just Can’t-Wait to Be King” from The Lion King? It could be titled “I Just Can’t Wait for My Dad to Be Killed in a Stampede.”
  • Is it still called beef when two vegan parents disagree?
  • “Erase my search history, son,” my father said as he died.
  • Fathers bring an extra pair of socks to the golf course in case they hit a hole-in-one.
  • Do you remember asking me yesterday why I got such a low score on the Math test? The boy next to me was absent on the day we took the exam.
  • A teacher challenged students to use the word “beans” in a sentence. “My father grows beans,” a girl said. “My mother cooks beans,” a boy explained. “We are all human beans,” said the third student.
  • A father chastised his son for thundering down the stairs and sent him back to walk down the stairs properly. He never saw the boy slide down the banister silently.
  • A young boy proudly informed his father that he nearly received a perfect score in every subject. The questions didn’t bother him; it was the answers that did!

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100+ funny dark jokes, Picture, Photo Source; parade.com

Black jokes

Comedians use dark racial jokes to educate the public about racial profiling. When someone roasts their race, most racial jokes are funny because they come across as inside jokes for that race. A comedian from another race might face backlash for making jokes about another race. Here are some truly disturbing jokes about races.

  • I’m not a racist, but I do enjoy a good (racist) joke. It’s fun to poke fun at myself.
  • Mexico does not have an Olympic team because anyone can run, jump, or swim in the United States. Adam and Eve were perplexed as to whether they were Black or White. So Adam went into Eden and yelled, “God, are we Black or White?” “YOU ARE WHAT YOU ARE,” yelled a powerful voice. He returned to Eve and informed her that they were White. “How do you know?” Eve inquired. “YOU ARE WHAT YOU ARE,” Adam responded. “YOU IS WHAT YOU IS,” he would have said if we were Black.10 best money transfer apps in Nigeria
  • A Black, White, and Mexican man discover and rub a genie’s lamp. The genie appears and inquires of the Black man, “What is your one wish?” “I wish to return to Africa with my people, happy and me and everything,” the Black man says. His wish is granted by the genie. “I wish to return to Mexico with my people, happy and everything,” the Mexican says. He also receives his wish. “What’s your one wish?” the genie asks the White guy. “You mean to tell me that all the black and Mexican people have left America?” the man asks. “Yes,” says the genie. “I’ll have a Coke,” says the white guy.

Morbid jokes

Making jokes about a health condition or disease affecting a population can help to raise awareness about it. Here are some morbid jokes about diseases that will make you laugh:

  • If you think I’d make a joke about Alzheimer’s, think again.
  • What should you do if an epileptic has a seizure in the bathtub? Include some laundry.
  • Why do skinny men prefer fat women? Because they require warmth in the winter and shade in the summer.
  • What is green and consumes meat? Syphilis.
  • I can’t believe there is still no cure for obesity. I expected it to be a walk in the park.
  • I was at a Weight Watchers party yesterday, but no one mentioned obesity. Simply put, there were too many elephants in the room.
  • Obesity does not run in families. They wouldn’t be fat if they ran.
  • After years of drinking, I’ve come to realize that alcohol cures obesity and bad looks. Not in myself, but in the people I observe.
  • What do you call a bacterial infection spread by two grizzlies? Tuberculosis.
  • What do you call a disease that has a large number of followers? Influenza.NYSC Portal

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Funny dark jokes

Consider using dark humor when discussing an abominable subject. Dark jokes require a certain level of comprehension. Consider the following examples. This list contains the best dark humor jokes.

  • My wife and I both agreed that we did not want children. We need the contact information of people who want to adopt children.
  • A blind woman informs her boyfriend that she is seeing someone else. It’s either bad or good news.
  • Even people who are good for nothing can make you smile. When you push them down the stairs, for example.
  • One man’s trash is another man’s treasure is a wonderful saying, but a terrible way to learn you were adopted.
  • So I went to my friend’s house, and he invited me to stay. So, in my usual fashion, I took matters into my own hands and had him thrown out. After all, I dislike visitors.
  • When my wife asked for lipstick the other day, I handed her a glue stick instead. It just so happens that she has decided not to speak to me right now.
  • When I knocked on my grandmother’s door, she asked who I was. Alzheimer’s must have gotten the best of her.105 Good Morning My Love Messages
  • I’ve given it enough thought, and my conclusion is that I’m sick of being an adult.
  • When I see a bird fly, I get jealous; when I see it fly into a window, I laugh my heart out.
  • NBA, I have a new definition for many White guys seated on a bench.
  • Why is Monica Lewinsky refusing to vote for Hillary Clinton? The Clinton presidency left her with a bad taste in her mouth.
  • A match will keep a man warm for a few hours. If you set a man on fire, he will stay warm for the rest of his life.
  • I was going to tell a joke about a dead baby, but I decided to abort.
  • I fell off my bike in 1980, twisted my foot, and injured my knee. I’m telling you this now because social media did not exist in the 1980s.
  • What should you do if a clown gang attacks you? Choose the juggler.

Hilarious dark humor puns

The reality of some of the world’s darkest jokes is that not everyone gets it. As a result, these funny jokes are intelligent and reserved for a select few. To understand the pun, you must be intelligent. Here are some additional examples.

  • A dark joke is like food; not everyone understands it.
  • What do you call a White girl who can outrun her brothers? The spinster is in redneck attire.
  • What was the elephant’s response to the naked man? How do you breathe through such a small space?
  • I wish my back lawn had emo grass. It would then cut itself.
  • As I do more laundry, nakedness appears more plausible.
  • Girlhood is like a bubble; all it takes is one idiot to pop it.
  • A man went into a library and requested a book on self-destruction. According to the librarian: “F**k off. You’re not going to get it back.”
  • What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? His nostrils.
  • According to recent research, humans consume more bananas than monkeys. I agree because I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
  • Have you heard of the blind prostitute? You have to give it to her.
  • What happened to Lucy during the bombing? Everywhere.
  • The day could not have turned out any worse. My ex-girlfriend was hit by a bus, and as a result, I lost my job as a bus driver.
  • My parents were perfect examples of broken relationship vices, so I never needed unstable relationships to teach me about them.200 Romantic Love Message For Her
  • It’s amusing how a man gave up s*x, drugs, alcohol, and expensive food to be healthy. This only lasted until he committed suicide.
  • When you get into a relationship, you get a rope.

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Really dark jokes

These are some options to consider if you want to demonstrate your mastery of dark humor. Before you crack one, keep in mind that the best dark humor jokes you can add to your repertoire will make any conversation instantly awkward. Here are some amusing dark humor puns and jokes to share with your friends:

  • When you are handed the camera every time there is a group photo, you know you are ugly.
  • Be quick to turn off the lights if you want to put an end to an argument between deaf people. The case has concluded!
  • I won the bet after my friend drowned in the lake, so it was a bittersweet ending for me.
  • “A little gas never killed anybody,” my boss farted in front of a Jewish client.
  • I sought a second opinion after my psychiatrist told me I was insane. He also said I was ugly.
  • Only the Holocaust can compare to discovering a worm in your apple.
  • Having a dirty mind makes for far more interesting conversations.
  • You’ll discover that the only difference between a gun and a rope is how long it takes to tie a knot with either.
  • My drinking issue is that I cannot afford to do so.
  • When in doubt, blow something up.
  • What happened to Lucy during the bombing? Everywhere. The day could not have turned out any worse.
  • My ex-girlfriend was killed by a bus, and I was fired as the bus driver.
  • My parents were perfect examples of broken relationship vices, so I never needed unstable relationships to teach me about them.
  • It’s amusing how a man gave up s*x, drugs, alcohol, and expensive food to be healthy. It only lasted until he committed suicide.
  • When you get into a relationship, you get a rope.
  • Orphans excel at baseball because they have no idea where they belong.

Very dark humor jokes

You could go ham on it if you don’t mind your dark humor and jokes being moderated. This collection of very dark jokes may make those around you laugh. They do, however, cross moral lines and may be offensive.

  • I recall all the people I’ve lost as I’ve gotten older. Perhaps a career as a tour guide was not the best fit for you.
  • I’ll never forget my grandfather’s final words to me before he passed away. “Do you still have the ladder?”
  • “Doctor, where are you taking me?” the patient inquired. “To the morgue,” said the doctor. “What?” The patient became terrified. “But I’m still alive!” “And we’re still not there,” the doctor explained.
  • My friend stated that he would jump off a cliff of his own free will. It’s fortunate that he drives a Civic.
  • “I have an imaginary girlfriend,” a son tells his father. “You know, you could do better,” the father sighs. “Thank you, Dad,” says the son. “I was talking to your girlfriend,” the father says, shaking his head.
  • “I have both good and bad news for you,” the doctor told his patient. “First, give me the good news,” the patient requested. “Your test results are in, and you have only two days to live,” the doctor said. “That’s the good news?” exclaimed the patient. “Can you tell me the bad news?” “I’ve been attempting to contact you for two days.’’
  • I want to die like my grandfather, who died peacefully in his sleep rather than screaming like the rest of the passengers in his car.
  • Except at a funeral, “I am sorry” and “I apologize” mean the same thing.
  • I enjoy dark humor. ‘Harold and Maude’ is my all-time favorite film.
  • Did you know your lovely cats have nine lives? They are therefore ideal for experimentation.
  • It is preferable to be loved than feared, but if you cannot be loved, fear will suffice.
  • Blow something up when in doubt.
  • My girlfriend’s pet dog died, so I bought her an identical replacement. It only aggravated her. “What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?” she screamed at me.
  • The cemetery is extremely crowded. People are clamoring to get in.JAMB Portal
  • They say that in every friendship group, there is a murderer. I suspected Dave and killed him before he could do any harm.

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Dark humor jokes have no limits

If you’re a sarcastic person, you could play with words to make funny, dark jokes. These are some examples you could think about. They’re mildly offensive but hilarious.

  • I don’t find it cute or romantic to see the names of lovers engraved on a tree. I find it strange that so many people bring knives on dates.
  • Never break someone else’s heart because they only have one. Instead, break bones because they have 206 of them.
  • I decided to pay a visit to my childhood home today. I asked the residents to let me in because I was nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face. My parents are the absolute worst.
  • My husband is furious because I have no sense of direction. So I packed my belongings and left.
  • At weddings, my elderly relatives would tease me, saying, “You’ll be next!” They soon began to do the same to me at funerals.
  • My grandfather believes I am overly reliant on technology. I labeled him a hypocrite and turned off his life support.
  • Even people who are good for nothing can make you smile. When you push them down the stairs, for example.
  • Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them passes out. His hunting companion immediately dials 911. “My friend isn’t breathing,” he exclaims into the phone. “How should I proceed?” “Relax,” the operator says. “I can assist you. Let’s first make sure he’s dead.” There is silence followed by a gunshot. “OK, now what?” says the guy as he returns to the phone.
  • The man who stole my diary recently died. My heart goes out to his family.
  • My father died because we couldn’t remember his blood type. He insisted that we “be positive” as he died, but it’s difficult without him.
  • My wife threatened to slam my head against the keyboard if I didn’t get off the computer. I’m not concerned because I believe she is jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
  • “Can you tell me your name, son?” The principal inquired about his student. “D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir,” the child replied. “Do you stutter?” inquired the principal. “No sir, my father stutters, but the guy who registered my name was a complete moron,” the student replied.
  • Which letter of the alphabet is a pirate’s favorite? None. Historians believe that the majority of pirates were illiterate.
  • My boss wished me a good day. So I returned home.
  • What’s the distinction between jelly and jam? A clown cannot fit into a tiny car.
  • A strong vocabulary is essential. One of my good friends would still be alive if I had known the difference between the words ‘antidote’ and ‘anecdote.’

If you’re feeling cheesy, these corny and funny dark humor jokes will have everyone laughing while rolling their eyes. However, you should assess the people to whom you are telling the puns. You don’t want to offend a sensitive audience by cracking a dark-humor joke.

DISCLAIMER: This article is intended to provide general information only and does not address individual circumstances. It is not a replacement for professional advice or assistance and should not be used to make decisions. Any action you take in response to the information in this article is entirely at your own risk and responsibility!

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